10 Things Teachers Would Tell Kids on the First Day of School, If They Were Honest

Today is the FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL for students in the Denison ISD & a few other districts. Sherman ISD students start back next Monday. So, in honor of teachers & kids returning to the classroom, here is a list of things teachers would tell kids on the first day of school, IF they were honest:

1. Don’t worry.  I don’t want to be here, either!
2. You all will learn so much this year.  Okay, maybe not that inbred kid over the corner, but the rest of you probably will.
3. If you don’t get me something nice for the holidays, I promise the second half of this year will be HELL for you!
4. I can retire in 9 years, 6 months, 3 weeks, 12 hours, and 52 minutes. But, who’s counting?
5. Alright kids, don’t leave an apple on my desk…unless it’s a bong!
6. If you get hurt at recess, just suck it up.
7. Your name’s “Kannon”?  Wow, what a dumb name.
8. Please just shut up and take your meds!
9. No running with scissors.  Unless you’re annoying.
10. Seriously, your artwork sucks & I’m going to send a note home to your parents recommending they should burn that ugly disaster immediately!