The Top Shark Fun Facts (Shark Week 2020 Kickoff)

Woo-hoo! It’s the Discovery Channel’s annual Shark Week. So please enjoy this list of The Top Shark Fun Facts.

• They’re nowhere near as vicious as the average millennial on Twitter.
• They mistake surfboards for seals. And surfers for people with real jobs.
• The shark with the most teeth is the bull shark. The shark with the least amount of teeth is the meth-mouth shark.
• Sharks that are eight years old giggle nonstop after hearing the words “sperm whale.”
• Most blue sharks have prescriptions for Zoloft.
• They’re annoyed that they can’t order seals on DoorDash, Grubhub or UberEats.
• Great white sharks kill fewer people than Great White, the band.
• Even though they’ll eat anything, even THEY avoid that weird white van in the food truck park.
• Female sharks are larger than male sharks, but male sharks are careful not to agree if their mate asks if their “fins” look fat.
• Sharks don’t ever sleep. Unless, of course, someone tries to make them sit through a baseball game this year.