The Top 7 Rejected Valentine’s Day Cards

If you’re going to pick up a Valentine’s Day card, stay safe with a traditional Hallmark type.

You’ll want to avoid anything like you’ll see on this list of The Top 7 Rejected Valentine’s Day Cards.

1. I know that we’ve been stuck at home . . . so this Valentine’s Day please, just leave me alone!
2. In my eyes you can do no wrong . . . except when your fat rolls spill out of your thong.
3. It’s cold outside.  The winds a-gustin’ . . . so, let’s stay inside & eat candy until our bellies are a-bustin’.
4. I think, you’re great, I think you’re super . . . even though I’d leave you in a second for that fox – Bradley Cooper.
5. I’d like to take you to far-off places . . . but I just can’t stand to look at other people’s faces.
6. You’re my Valentine. You’re my boo . . . despite your hair being full of Gorilla Glue.
7. No one thought we’d last this long . . . because I’m team Godzilla and you root for Kong.