The Top 7 Car Buying Tips
September 9, 2020 4:41AM CDT

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In the market for a new car? If you are, we hope you’ll first take a minute to check out this list of The Top 7 Car Buying Tips.
- “Show me the CarFax” was funny for a minute, but now it’ll just get you punched in the throat.
- If the tires are balder than the salespeople, walk away.
- Paying cash is a great way to get the best price. And also let others know you’re a drug dealer.
- To get some extra value out of the deal, go to the free coffee dispenser and slip as many creams and sugars into your pocket as you can.
- Do NOT attack the dealership’s giant inflatable balloon-man flailing around in the wind because you thought he was making fun of you.
- Wave a wad of cash in the air and watch salesmen crawl over each other for your attention. It’s invigorating.
- Make sure the ignition can handle the weight of all your Classic Rock band key chains.